Boneless Wings Should Be Eaten With Same Care as All Other Food, Court Decides

The Ohio Supreme Court has ruled that a man who nearly choked on a bone in an order of boneless chicken wings should have guarded against a bone potentially being there by, you know, chewing and eating the wings with the same care as any piece of food. The restaurant was therefore not found liable for his injuries. The decision upheld the ruling of a lower court in the state, with both courts denying the case from advancing to a trial.

While this seems like a situation that could have just been solved by the restaurant apologizing and offering a free meal to make up for the mistake, this is a litigious nation, and so it had to take several courts, including the state’s supreme court, to issue a ruling related to boneless wings.

The incident in question happened in 2016 at a wings restaurant when a man and the group he was with ordered boneless wings with Parmesan garlic sauce. The type of sauce doesn’t matter, but we just thought you might like to know.

As the man ate, he felt what seemed like a piece of meat going down the wrong pipe. He went to the restroom to try to clear his throat but couldn’t. Over the next few days, he ran a fever and had trouble eating, so he went to the emergency room, where a doctor found the chicken bone. The bone had ended up tearing part of his esophagus and causing an infection.

The bone was 1 and 3/8 inches long, while the boneless wings in the order were described as being one inch long. So, unless someone’s math is off, apparently there was a bone sticking out of the wing, but it still went unnoticed.

“I’m no expert on how to eat, but I have been doing it my entire life. While I feel bad for the guy, and hope he has fully recovered, my advice for anyone would be to at least look at your food before eating it, and then to also chew for a little while, as a way of fully avoiding a large bone being in your meal. But hey, that’s just me.”

– Middle-aged man who has eaten many meals in his life

As part of the Ohio Supreme Court ruling, one judge wrote that boneless wings should be considered a style of cooking, and does not guarantee there will be no bones or bone fragments, especially since bones are a naturally occurring thing in meats. Therefore, people should still eat with some caution.

“I don’t know about boneless wings as a style of cooking,” commented Bob Harlihyn, a self-proclaimed wings expert. “But people should definitely eat boneless wings as a reasonable adult would eat any food. It’s not worth it to be in the right while you’re forced to go to the hospital.”

A state senator in Ohio has said he disagrees with the court ruling and will look into whether a law can be passed, if not specifically related to boneless wings, then to consumer protections more generally.

“I hope a law can be passed,” said a local Ohio man, Fred. “There shouldn’t be bones in boneless wings. And sometimes I wonder if my decaf coffee actually has caffeine, because it makes me feel jittery. On the other hand, it could be the small mountain of sugar I pour into the cup. I guess we’ll never know.”